PS: "I know some good massage techniques." Conor, you had me at this fine line of dialogue.
August 30, 2012
MY LYFE ANTHEM
Hot Cheetos and Takis are so last week, y'all. "Vegas Girl" is where it's at! This gem of a song came to me from my "Top Hits" Pandora station early one morning...and let me tell ya, 'tis a TOP HIT in my book. In a gist, it's a fun lil ditty about how obsessed this British teen (tween?) is with the slutty girls of $in City. I get it. I do. Me and all my Vegas friends, well, we're all hoebags. That ain't NO LIE! A special shout out to all my Mormon gal pals as well (Vegas is town heavily populated by those of the LDS faith)! THIS ONE'S FOR YOU!
PS: "I know some good massage techniques." Conor, you had me at this fine line of dialogue.
PS: "I know some good massage techniques." Conor, you had me at this fine line of dialogue.
August 25, 2012
YA GAY? NO WAY.
God, do I love my franz who live in Salt Lake City and the whole beautiful polygamy dolloped state of UTAH, but this is cray town!
NBC’S SALT LAKE CITY AFFILIATE WON'T AIR THE NEW NORMAL
ALSO...I think the fact that Justin Bartha is just so dern cute should be reason enough to leave this show on the air.
NBC’S SALT LAKE CITY AFFILIATE WON'T AIR THE NEW NORMAL
ALSO...I think the fact that Justin Bartha is just so dern cute should be reason enough to leave this show on the air.
August 24, 2012
SPANKIN' NEW JAM: HOT CHEETOS AND TAKIS
If you choose to do ONE thing today...
I hope you GET INTO THIS SICK BEAT. If not for me then do it for the kids!
HAPPY FRIDAY.
August 23, 2012
CANKLE PROBLEMS
Hey, y'all...Me here, with another exciting update on My So Blonde Life. I have been thinking about changing the Blonde to Shitty to be more fitting of my current situation, and I'll tell you about it right now:
I HAVE A SPIDER BITE THAT HAS BLOWN UP MY ENTIRE LEG, MOSTLY MY ANKLE (hence, cankle) INTO TWICE THE SIZE OF MY OTHER LEG.
Make no mistake, It looks like I have diabetus (Molly pronunciation) of the leg. It's all shiny and diabetus like. In other words, I'm cute. You want to date me. The bite itself resembles a bullet wound, maybe? IDK, I've never seen a bullet wound up close and personal, but if it looks purple, yellow, and grey with lots of red swelling then I'm right.
I'm no doctor, but I think boogers came out of it yesterday.
I would show you pictures, but I deleted them all from my phone because I was all like...ew.
Something miraculous happened this morning when I woke up, however. It isn't SO red anymore, and now it pretty much looks like a casual school yard scab you get from hitting the gravel when playing kissing tag. You never played that in first and second grade? Well, you have to kiss the people you tag...I'm surprised we never got in trouble for such public displays of affection being so young. I think a game of kissing tag would be way more fun as adults though. There is a lot more risk involved. Like the risk of not knowing if the person who's "it" has the herp. THAT'S THE RISK YOU TAKE. I think I'll start a league, but you obviously have to be STD tested before joining. That's a given. Herpes? YOU'RE OUTTA HERE. But, I'll definitely be accepting applicants with cankles. I'm no bigot.
I HAVE A SPIDER BITE THAT HAS BLOWN UP MY ENTIRE LEG, MOSTLY MY ANKLE (hence, cankle) INTO TWICE THE SIZE OF MY OTHER LEG.
Make no mistake, It looks like I have diabetus (Molly pronunciation) of the leg. It's all shiny and diabetus like. In other words, I'm cute. You want to date me. The bite itself resembles a bullet wound, maybe? IDK, I've never seen a bullet wound up close and personal, but if it looks purple, yellow, and grey with lots of red swelling then I'm right.
I'm no doctor, but I think boogers came out of it yesterday.
I would show you pictures, but I deleted them all from my phone because I was all like...ew.
Something miraculous happened this morning when I woke up, however. It isn't SO red anymore, and now it pretty much looks like a casual school yard scab you get from hitting the gravel when playing kissing tag. You never played that in first and second grade? Well, you have to kiss the people you tag...I'm surprised we never got in trouble for such public displays of affection being so young. I think a game of kissing tag would be way more fun as adults though. There is a lot more risk involved. Like the risk of not knowing if the person who's "it" has the herp. THAT'S THE RISK YOU TAKE. I think I'll start a league, but you obviously have to be STD tested before joining. That's a given. Herpes? YOU'RE OUTTA HERE. But, I'll definitely be accepting applicants with cankles. I'm no bigot.
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