OH MY CHRIST. If THIS isn't the best thing that's happened to the internet since all week or something like that! In some mystical turn of kismetic fortune PATTON OSWALT AND JUDY BLUME HAD A BIBLIOGRAPHY-OFF ON TWITTER TODAY!!! I'm sitting in the middle of the local Intelligentsia looking for ANYONE to cling to in this moment of pure joy! I'm actually speechless and doing the weird thing where you're like looking to your right (no one there), looking to your left (not a soul there either), and then you just lift your hands up, slap 'em straight down on your thighs and take audible breaths outward as to say, "geez", "oh man", and "if only Carol Anne could've been here when I discovered this!" God damnit, I wish I knew a Carolanne because that name seems so appropriate at this time. I'm sure wherever there is a Carolanne out there, she's surely enjoying this random Twitter stumble upon. I don't have a twitter or follow anyone on Twitter, so THANK GOD for Jezebel's discovery. Also, a quick shout out to Jezebel, in general, for reminding me that I am a woman, and I should educate myself accordingly even though feminist rage and thought overload makes me feel, for the most part, squeamish. More on that rubbish at a later time.
But seriously, this dialogue consisting of exclusively Blume references makes my heart swell with delight. I'm not naive to the fact that Oswalt has NO fucking idea what he's even talking about. I can imagine he got SO deep into this twitter dialogue that his guilt led him to quick Wickepedia Judy Blume for a list of novels she's penned. I think this was the exact moment he took Wicki action:
"I'm in a bibliography-off with Judy Blume! Talk about places I never meant to be..."
You guys. YOU GUYS. You have to read this...IMMEDIATELY. I still don't believe in Twitter, but I do believe in magic whether in or out of a young girl's heart.
If you don't understand the "in or out of a young girl's heart" reference please listen to the song below. I like this version as opposed to the original just because there are puppies in this video and totally hawt blonde chix!
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